I am here today to chat about something that was very real for me recently. I want to pull back the curtain and let you into my life because I like you to know that I am a normal mama just like you.
Which brings me to...
The Wonder Weeks.
It's basically a book that I found out about a couple weeks after Patrick was born and it talks about the certain growth spurts that babies go through. It also tells you what type of behavior to expect during each Wonder Week or growth spurt and it’s a super helpful resource! Especially if you notice your baby is all of a sudden acting extremely cranky and maybe that’s not their normal behavior. This way you can at least justify why your baby is acting the way that they are.
Anyways, a few weekends ago we were at my boyfriend’s aunt’s house and my normally well-behaved 16 month old baby Patrick decided to go ape-shit. I don’t know if the new environment triggered him, I’m not really sure, but all of a sudden it seemed like he had reverted back to this cranky, little newborn baby that I didn’t know how to take care of. In addition to that, he runs all over the place, and, so, being in a new house that he wasn’t used to; chasing around this little toddler boy was super exhausting and I just started having feelings of my post-partum anxiety coming up again.
It frustrated me I kept feeling like, "I thought we were through this." I just felt kinda defeated. I was exhausted, I was anxious, confused, just feeling so unlike my normal self, and I just got really frustrated. I’m like oh here we are again. Patrick all of a sudden turned into this aggressive, stubborn baby who just wouldn’t take no for an answer. And then it hit me...
I wasn't taking care of myself.
When I realized that I was like well no shit Sherlock, no wonder why you’re feeling so bad, because you’re not even doing anything to take care of yourself. Full transparency, I didn’t shower for like a day and a half. I didn’t have any alone time. Basically everything that I’m used to doing was not happening so no wonder I felt so horrible, right?
It was a great reminder that I have to take care of myself because if I don't EVERYTHING goes to shit.
Here were the 3 things I decided to do...
1) Go on a 2 mile walk to Starbucks with the baby. I was able to get my Starbucks, which you guys know I love. It calmed the baby down a little bit and I was in heaven just having that peace for a while.
2) I put the baby down and took a shower. Do you know how amazing a shower feels after going without one for a day and a half? Oh wait, you are a mom so yes you do!
3) I sat in silence while the baby took a nap.
Literally just these three things made me feel like a million bucks and they weren’t things that took a lot of time or money or investment or anything like that.
And that’s the message I want to relay to you mama, sometimes giving ourselves the care we need doesn’t have to be this long drawn-out process. Sometimes it’s as simple as coming up with three self-care non-negotiables. I find it super important to have three self-care non-negotiables that you can perform almost every single day that will allow you to feel like your best self. And like I said they don’t have to be difficult, complicated things.
For me, it’s taking a shower, going on my Starbucks run and having some peace & quiet time. Those are three things that really just support me in being my best self every single day and things that I started as early as Patrick being one week old.
I want you to really consider what your three self-care non-negotiables can be and if you are feeling brave and called to do so, I’d love for you to post in the comments below and let me know what those are. I know how it feels to have anxiety, and confusion, and kinda just feel like your mind is like scrambled eggs.
I truly want to help support you in feeling your best every day, mama. BECAUSE LIFE DOES NOT END WITH MOTHERHOOD.
And mama, if you ever feel guilty for putting time aside to take care of yourself then you may want to check out my FREE masterclass on kissing mommy guilt goodbye for good where I will teach you the same 5-step process that helped me overcome that nasty guilt! GRAB YOUR SEAT HERE.